It’s that time of year when people start talking about New Year’s Resolutions and the whole “new year, new me” thing……..but how long does that last? More often than not, these resolutions are never achieved as studies have shown. The big question is why is this the case?
I’m not sure how it is in other parts of the world, but here where I am, so-called New Year’s Resolutions have become a bit of a regular thing each year in and year out. You can actually hear people talking about how last year they quickly broke their resolutions and how their life just went back to normal…… so what’s the point of talking about it in the first place if one already know they’re going to break them? How can we make sure these goals or resolutions are met?
Most New Year’s resolutions are usually health-related like quitting smoking, having regular exercise routines, incorporating healthy eating in your family meals or even embarking on a weight-loss program and making changes to ones’ financial situation. All these are made genuinely and from the heart and yet are the most difficult to achieve hence why people quit early!
I must emphasise though, that it so happens that some people still do manage to fulfil and achieve their goals and continue to live a successful happy life because of that decision to never quit. If some people can achieve their goals set, surely you should be able to do it too but you have to do it right from the beginning. So what’s their secret to making it through and succeeding?
Well, before we delve into this, here are some key points to remember. For any goal or new yer’s resolutions to stick or yield results, there has to be a plan of execution. It is so vital that this plan must have these 5 C’s of success to actually see the results. You must ask yourself if your plan: has CLARITY, is CONCISE, COMPELLING, you’ll be CONSISTENT and COMMITTED to the cause. When you have this in place, then you’re creating a conducive environment to give you a good chance of success.
Now, without prior planning and preparations, it’ll be an uneasy journey that may lead to quitting or no success. You must first commit to yourself, to your growth, and to becoming the best version of yourself YOU can be. Only then you can hope to succeed! Now ask yourself the following questions which I believe will help you see the bigger picture and not just have New Year’s resolution!
Here are a few questions to get you started……..
*What is in your life right now that has been holding you back for a long time to progress further?
*What emotions do you want to feel more in the coming year?
*Who do you have to become in order to be the best version of yourself this year?
*Why is it critically important that you make it through this year and fulfil your desired goal?
*What do you have to believe about yourself in order for this resolution to come to pass?
If your New Year’s resolutions are about your health, consider these questions before you start as part of the planning phase:
*What is it about your health that needs changing and why?
*Why do you want to achieve the goal you’re setting?
*What is it that may cause challenges for you in order to fulfil your new year’s resolutions or goals?
*Do you have plans to help you through these challenges?
So What Is The Secret To Making New Year’s Resolutions Stick?
1. Have Clarity On What You Want To Achieve
The secret comes from knowing deep down (in the subconscious) what you really want to change. You can tell yourself you want to quit smoking and it’s a great idea and a starting point but you must first have a clear picture as to why you want to do it. That’s why I put those questions above! Then once you know or have an idea, set out some goals that will help you achieve your resolutions. Ensure you set SMART goals as they’ll keep you in tune and focussed throughout your journey.
You would have heard already of SMART goals model hence I am not going to go in-depth except to say that they should have both short term and long term goals. What I will mention to you however, is another pattern of setting goals that can improve your chances of success and it’s know as Well-Formed Outcomes. It’s a model we use in NLP that can help you achieve your New Year’s resolutions including your day to day goals (which are called Targets). I am emphasising this because written goals setting is very crucial and can dramatically change your life.
There are a few Well-formed Outcomes models out there but the one I like and think would make sense to you is called PECSAW. You can definitely use this and even help someone you know who is struggling to achieve their goals and/or new year’s resolutions.
P – POSITIVE
Your goals must be stated in the positive. You must say what you want to achieve and not what you don’t want. Be real and clear about it and you can answer questions like: what do you want? What are you doing right now or going to do to achieve this?
E – EVIDENCE
So how will you know that you have achieved your goal? When you are clear and know what you want to achieve, the evidence will then be so apparent and obvious. Ensure you state and know what it will be, how you will feel or what you will see, hear or even think when you have achieved your goal.
C – CONTEXT
The context is how will this set of goals apply to your life. When and where do you want this and you can do this by setting time frame; for example, if you’re setting a goal for weight loss, you can then say you want to lose twelve pounds before valentine’s day or your before your such and such holiday time arrives. Make sure you’re very specific about it.
S – SELF ACHIEVABLE
Now, this is the most important one because you need to be able to self-achieve and self-maintain all your goals! It would be so great if we could get people to achieve our goals!! Make sure you find all the resources you need to be able to achieve your set resolutions or goals. By doing so, you ensure that you’re fully in control of what is coming. By maintaining control of your goals, you somehow feel empowered and keep going forward.
A – ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES
Here it’s all about changes that happen when you decided to change something in your life. As you may know, everything affects everything. When you take a step to change your life in some way, a lot of things will also change because of that initial change. You can call this the pros and cons of setting those goals or new year’s resolutions. What will improve when you lose that weight? How will losing twelve pounds weight be of benefit to you? Make sure you cover this in-depth because it’ll power you to success if done properly.
Then look at the disadvantages to your pursuing that goal. For example, if you decide to lose that twelve pounds, is there anything that would be affected negatively by that? Are you going to lose anything by losing some weight? We also call this Ecology check, to mean checking anything that could affect you internally and/or working on those goals. We want to make sure everything is set well to lead you to achieve those goals.
W – WORTHWHILE
This step can also be called attractiveness or compelling step! It’s always easy to set up and start working on your goal. However, maintaining it needs willpower and daily motivation hence the importance of making sure they’re worthwhile from the start. Make sure you know what’s driving you to take that step, the energy, the passion and the real “why” you want it. It’s so important to make sure you get this covered because as you know, life happens to everyone and it can get in the way of your journey.
So your goal has to be that worthwhile that you will be able to get back into it even if you get detoured. So it has to be that compelling to you. You may be working on this goal for others like, losing weight so you can be able to enjoy life with your kids or family… that’s another way of making it worthwhile and everyone is different, so do what works for you. Just make sure it’s worth fulfilling!
2. Start Small
One of the things that make people fail at their goals and fail early is the tendency to make goals that are huge and out of reach. There is nothing wrong with dreaming big and I actually encourage that but the idea is to start with small steps and work your way up. We talked about losing weight earlier and it is important to remember that losing weight encompasses other things to be able to lose that twelve pounds. You need to set up a plan with your coach, diet plan, exercise plan and then work your way up to that weight.
In that manner, you will be able to see the results as they come. You may be working on something other than weight loss, in the same way, do it in a way that will allow you to be consistent and productive without dependency on anyone but you. Again remember, taking on too much at once is one of the real reasons why people fail at fulfilling their new year’s resolution. Small steps will always lead to your long term success as long as you don’t quit.
3. Create New Habits
One of the great ways to help yourself remain consistent when it comes to staying on track with your new year’s resolution is to make your goals are part of your daily routines. By doing some little activities daily in relation to your goals makes it more doable as you’re not solely focusing on the main goals themselves. So it’s quite important to set up those daily or weekly goals or habits that will eventually add up without you thinking of the endpoint.
As mentioned earlier, when preparing and setting the strategy, make sure you actually write it somewhere and not just save it in your head. The act of writing makes it easier to remember and to even review later if you get stuck.
4. Change Takes Time
Remember that it takes time to develop a habit and the same thing happens when you’re trying to establish change. Those habits you’re resolving to change now have been there for a long time and it’s great that you want to change them, but give yourself some time. To achieve that resolution will take significant time while you grow through the process to achieve it, so be patient with yourself and the process.
The main thing to learn is that because you’re doing this for the first time, it will take time and throughout that time, you will learn, grow, be empowered and see your capabilities. It’s a journey and not a marathon, so make sure you’re geared up to embrace whatever comes with the journey and enjoy your transformation.
Whatever resolutions you have decided to work on, it may be something that will be a continuous learning process for the rest of your life and that is still fine too. But don’t let the length of time or challenges deter you towards quitting. Always find a way around any detour you face, this will help you be successful
5. Be Your Own Source Of Motivation
The first few weeks or even a couple of months of the year may seem easy to work on your resolutions because you’re fresh and motivated to reach that desired goal. This is the time when you haven’t faced the challenges related to actually changing the habit or behaviour. The reality comes when you start struggling to get out of bed to go to that gym or to go another day without smoking or missing a day without putting up content for your audience or anything related to what you’re working on.
Remember that you are here because you wanted to change something in your life. So when this happens always remind yourself why you started in the first place. Think of how worthwhile this journey is for you and the advantages of not quitting. This will help you refocus your mind and be tuned to what is really important. Always find inspiration around you or source it keeping in mind that you’re the only person who can motivate yourself and succeed. You can’t depend on someone to come and motivate you! This can only be achieved by self, right!
Read, listen or watch something if you have to, but never think of giving up or quitting because by doing so, you eliminate any chance of you achieving anything. Reevaluate or review what needs to be done to achieve your goal and always be willing to listen, being teachable and make amendments as long as they’re there to help you move up.
6. Be Accountable To Someone
Having someone to be accountable to has been found to have a big hand in individuals achieving their goals or new year’s resolutions. That is why you have to have an accountability buddy that knows about your plans and strategies in place to help you achieve your goals. This can be someone like your professional mentor, a coach or someone that you rate highly or look up to and wouldn’t want to disappoint because you quit. So it definitely can’t be your mate as there is a high chance they would let you off the hook easily!
One other thing is to let your circle of influence know that you’re embarking on this journey. The change affects everything not just you but those around you as well. Not everyone will understand or be for you but just tell them as more of a courtesy than anything else. You’re not seeking their permission but sharing your intentions.
Final Point
Everyone who has been successful at something or anything started somewhere and they have been through what you will go through. Achieving your set new year’s resolutions or goals do happen but only if you have a set up path and some strategies laid out above. There is more you can do and the main secret is remaining consistent and not giving up when the challenges come facing you.
It’s important to focus your energies on what you really want and not on what you don’t want, which is very important. Know your beliefs well and attitudes and not just focus on behaviour that will come, as I always say, everything affects everything. Remember the PECSAW model I mentioned at the beginning and also the SMART goals model, these are there to help you see the value in setting up your goals and new year’s resolutions, so use them to your advantage.
Finally, never forget to be grateful for every little achievement that comes along the way. An attitude of gratitude will give you clarity and allow you to appreciate the time you’re putting in towards your goals. Always start with the end in mind and in that way give yourself every available chance. I will repeat this again, every little step matters and adds up to become a huge success, only if you don’t stop!
Don’t forget to give yourself a treat when you reach a set of milestones, enjoy what you’re engaged in and have fun if you have to. No one else can do this but you, it’s to be achieved by self, remember!
PLAN. ACT. BELIEVE. ACHIEVE
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