Having strong relationships with others is critical to the success of what we do. To put it bluntly, if you want to be successful in life, you need to have healthy relationships. This applies to everyone you engage with on a regular basis, including members of your family and social circle, coworkers, acquaintances, and customers. This is also supported by research that has shown that having healthy relationships reduces stress levels, gives you a sense of purpose in life and importantly encourages healthy behaviours in general hence increasing your chances of success in what you do.
These are the types of people who are likely to invigorate, excite, and encourage us, as well as present us with a challenge to bring out the best in us. During trying times, they can also serve as our refuge, a place where we are assured of finding solace and tranquilly, as well as support from others.
Because of these reasons, healthy relationships need to be cultivated in order for them to develop into an important contributor to our level of happiness and success as we move through life.
“The foundation of any healthy relationship whether social or professional is the ability to sincerely listen to the other person. It also signifies respect for the person speaking.”~ SJ Johnson
The 7 Powerful Habits that will dramatically help improve, strengthen and grow your relationships
1. Remember The Things That Matter
All of us have things in our lives we are proud of and things that have special meaning to us. Even with those closest to us, we tend to overlook these things.
The first stage is to keep an eye out for these cues when you’re conversing with others. Examples include the names of children/spouses, pets, interests/hobbies, or notable accomplishments.
When the chance presents itself, bring up these topics. When you recall the things the other person cares about, it shows that you care about them. They’ll be touched and grateful, and they’ll go out of their way to remember what’s important to you.
2. Learn To listen
Every one of us has experienced the aggravation of speaking with someone who isn’t paying attention, whether in our social relationships or at work. This is the individual who looks around the room and nods absentmindedly. They’re the ones who sit there and fiddle with their phone instead of paying attention to you. What emotions does it elicit in you? A large majority of individuals find it impolite and disrespectful. So, do you want to be heard and understood by others?
Learning to listen is the next relationship-building behaviour we can all do. We can either: listen to understand or listen to respond… where do you fall into? There are inherent distinctions between us as individuals, including personality differences, how we process the information we’re given, typical gender differences, cultural and family beliefs, etc., which necessitate tremendous skill and experience. A study by Faye Doell (2003) concluded that those individuals who listen to understand have “greater satisfaction in their interpersonal relationships than others.” All of these factors influence how a message is received and the response required, which is not necessarily a practical solution but may consist of a reassuring embrace, a boost of faith or confidence, or similar.
One of the key points to take here is that you make frequent eye contact and give the other individual your whole attention. Nothing else in the room or in your hands should divert your attention away from the person you’re speaking with at any one time. You must also try and sit as motionless and calmly as possible and if you put in your best effort to grasp what is being said as a starting point, love will speak volumes, whether the topic is positive or unpleasant, and the relationship will remain a safe haven for both of you.
Furthermore, it’s critical that you refrain from pre-planning your response before fully hearing what the other person has to say. You don’t have to think about it, just wait until they’ve spoken. When it’s your moment to speak, you’ll know just what to say if you’ve been listening intently. Active Listening is making a deliberate decision to hear what others are saying, concentrating on their words and messages without interruptions. Remember to talk respectfully rather than in a manner that could be perceived as condescending when you have the opportunity to attempt to be understood.
3. Ask Pertinent Questions
This important point is closely related to the preceding one, which is attentive listening. Asking important questions demonstrates to the other individual that you have heard and comprehended them. Now, you wish to learn more about the issue or topic you’ve been discussing. Take time to know a little bit more about the person’s experiences, feelings, opinions, and interests in relation to what you’re discussing.
This offers you bonus points because it demonstrates you really want to learn more and, as stated previously, it shows your attentiveness. Always begin your query with a concise summary of the previous statement. Remember that this is essential. For instance, “So what you’re saying is…” followed by the appropriate enquiry.
4. Express Your Emotions
Learn to openly express your emotions and share them with those close to you. This makes others feel trusted and valued, which are the two most important cornerstones of healthy relationships. One way that can truly help you be able to express yourself is to be “Your Authentic Self “at all times. To do this well, you first have to know you; who you really are, what you want in life and where in life are you headed. Also, being alone gives you a chance to think about yourself more clearly. This also lets you accept what’s true and figure out how you want to act from now on.
Be liberal in expressing your affection and gratitude to family and friends. Your openness will cause them to open up, and you will be showered tenfold with the same. When you open up to friends and loved ones about specific fears or worries, you will get incredible support and encouragement.
They’ll also open up and reveal their own personal anxieties and worries, which will strengthen your closeness and trust. Even if your feelings are negative, expressing them calmly and measuredly will earn you respect for your candour. I understand that expressing your emotions at work can be difficult, if not impossible. This, however, usually helps to create trust within your team.
5. Have A Positive Attitude
One of the greatest discoveries in creating deeper relationships is to increase your positivity and adopt an optimistic outlook on life. This is supported by research and does not imply that problems are being ignored by sweeping them under the rug. You are simply finding methods to continue to enjoy life despite the fact that it continues to throw golf balls at you. If you and your partner like specific activities together, engage in them more often or seek out others who share your interests. This will increase your pleasant emotions, hence strengthening your relationship.
Nobody enjoys the company of a bitter cynic who finds fault with everything. People are naturally drawn to those that exude positivism and optimism because these characteristics are contagious. They improve a person’s sense of self-worth. Therefore, the secret to a happy life is focusing on and creating more positives around you. When you exude tranquil cheerfulness, you appear self-confident, in charge, and just enjoyable to be around. The approach to cultivating this trait is to see the good in everything and to express thankfulness for all that you already possess.
Positivity fosters more positivity and will rub off on the people you deal with, creating a strong circle of individuals who like being in your presence and in the company of each other. Create an attitude of gratitude on a daily basis and make yourself and others feel appreciated and joyful by demonstrating thanks and appreciation, no matter how modest the gestures may be. As a result of this, it will encourage the other person’s continued involvement in the relationship.
6. Be Genuine and Sincere
Never attempt to strengthen a relationship by deception. Others will detect the odour a mile away! Sincerity, on the other hand, may also be immediately detected by others and is a crucial connection enhancer that we all require.
When giving a compliment or providing assistance or advice, do so because you sincerely want to. If not, do not say it for the sake of saying it. Always attempt to place yourself in the other person’s position in order to demonstrate true empathy. If you have nothing genuine to say about something or someone, it is best to remain silent. Words have the ability to break or make someone, so always be kind, real, and sincere.
7. Be Trustworthy
Never lie, never tell a fib or disclose any information that was shared with you in confidence. Importantly, never sacrifice your personal values and principles. Together, these factors will establish unbreakable trust with the individuals in your life whether social or professional.
Building a reputation as a trustworthy individual with strong ethics and beliefs indicates your dependability and responsibility to others. When others have complete faith in you, your connections on every level will flourish.
If you want to be successful in life, whatever that may mean to you, one thing that is guaranteed to help you do so is cultivating long-lasting relationships, whether we consider this from a social or a professional perspective. Knowing where you want to go is the first step to getting there. We all aspire to have a long-lasting, mutually supportive relationship full of affection and humour that will last into old age.
Despite this, our daily encounters often defy this purpose, with egos and weak conflict resolution skills leaving us feeling battered and bruised. When things get rough, it’s important to start with the end in mind so that we can establish our own ground rules for what can and cannot be done to prevent unnecessary damage. The same applies in the workplace as well where setting your proper goal accordingly will help you avoid a disastrous outcome that may cost you your job.
These powerful habits are not all of those that will enable you to create healthier relationships, but they are some of the effective ones that will bring you the happiness, fulfilment, and success in life that you are seeking for. It is imperative that you do not simply read this information and then file it away since the practices described here provide an excellent basis for establishing and cultivating new relationships that will endure for a lifetime. For this reason, it is not enough to simply read it.
You will not see the results until you have made these behaviours a consistent part of your daily routine; only then will you be able to evaluate their efficacy. It could take some time before you notice the benefits, but everything is contingent on you getting started right away. You can achieve the success you seek by spreading this information to others, developing relationships that will last, and achieving your goals.
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